Eat your leaders!

January 6, 2009 on 1:00 pm | In Insanity, Internet, advertising | 2 Comments

Stopping by my friend Six Sider’s blog, Twang of the Void, I read about a bakery selling cookies for the inauguration of President Obama. It’s Max and Benny’s in Illinois, a Jewish deli with fairly odd ideas about what to sell for this historic occasion.

Obama? Sure, you’ve gotta have Obama. His mouth’s a little off, but we’ll let it slide. After all, what child’s going to say no to eating a man in a suit cookie? President Obama! Is food!

His wife-elect, Michelle, is looking pretty good, although the artist went a little overboard with the cheekbones. Someone probably said, “make sure she’s got CHEEKBONES. Big ol’ cheekbones. Then people will know who it is they’re eating,” and the artist figured that the cheekbones were what set her apart from other black women who have become cookies.

Joe Biden, sadly, could easily pass for John McCain, although his hair’s a little poofier. He might have been the back-up design, should Obama have lost. But he’s smiling, in a good mood, and apparently chewing extra-white gum.

Here’s where it starts getting odd. This is Obama with grey hair. You know, from that one time he had grey hair. Remember? You don’t? Maybe it’s Future Barack, sent to the past to warn his past self about something. Maybe it’s his mutant love child with Bill Clinton.

This is the floating head of Abe Lincoln that advised Obama through his difficult campaign. Only Obama and these bakers could see him. He’s got that look of a neighborhood toadie on his face, like he was saying something like, “Hit him again, Deke! Hit him again!” Also, one of our greatest presidents did not warrant the white teeth icing. See how far things have advanced since 1860?

Rod Blagojevich, or “Lil’ Blago” as he’s listed as on the site. Whereas Obama, the president-elect, gets only a head and shoulders and the man who freed the slaves gets a head with no teeth, this scummy politician gets an entire body. And cash!

And finally, Obama with a top hat that makes him look like Biggie Smalls. Obama isn’t known for wearing a top hat, and in fact most politicians stopped wearing them around FDR. He has it tipped at a jaunty angle though, which makes me think he’s trying for a “Mary Poppins”-esque chimney sweep thing. Or he’s starting a career singing soulful R&B ballads asserting that girl, he never gonna do you wrong.